Telling people you're expecting a 4th under 4

April 1, 2019

 

I would hazard a guess and say that many of you will know that we are blessed with 3 children, all steps and stairs at ages 3, 2 and 1. And I would hazard another guess that many of you will also know that we are expecting our 4th child in June 2019.

 

You see, this is a great time for our little family as this is something that me and my wife have always wanted. A large family, close in age so that we can all share the experiences at roughly the same stages in life, that the kids always have each other no matter what.

 

But , and this may seem like a bit of a rant, but when people look at us out and about or shopping with the 3 kids and notice Clare’s bump, then they give you a questionable look.

People for those couple of seconds are judging us.

 

It’s funny because if we speak to people that we have just met for example, and we tell them, you get the same old awkward jokes, no TV in the house, aw you’re hands will be full, and so on, you’ll have to tie a knot in the end of it. Again, they judge you that quickly.

 

My wife is 25 so she is still young, and at a tender of age of only 31, I would like to think that I am still young, and this is where I think people get that awkwardness from. But what they don’t probably realise is that we are married, so why is this coming across as frowned upon?

 

You see it makes me question societies values, and how they have completely turned on their heads. Why does a married couple who love each other, and wants these children, seem to be judged more than someone who has the same number of children to many fathers or isn’t in a committed relationship. Or parents who may or may not be in the picture? I just can’t understand it! But maybe I am wrong.

 

Now its not a dig at someone in that situation, because as long as the children are well looked after that’s all that is important. It’s the point that, it seems to be that everything has changed from how things were maybe as recently as 30 years ago. Traditional values seem to have disappeared from life now.

 

Truth is, I don’t really care what these people think because I love my family and because they will have such a strong bond and such a great support network for each other. They will be able to teach other and pick up things from their older siblings, which we have seen already. We go through the phases at the same time instead of gaps between them all.

 

Now, in fairness, I don’t want 10 children like those families on television, I wouldn’t be able to cope with all the madness, really who could! But I don’t see why having 4 children is much different than days gone by, for example my parents all had lots of siblings and it was a wonderful thing.

 

So I guess my point is, why is it such a big deal if we have 1 child, 4 children or 8 children. They will be raised well, in a loving, stable and supportive home and that should be all that matters.

 

I would love to hear your thoughts on big families, and people who have numerous children.

 

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©2018 by JamesyNI.
All thoughts here are my own.